that august 3rd. it’s funny how i still remember it after 16 years. every august 3rd i’m aware it is august 3rd; quite a special date amongst many special dates. and it strangely felt as if i had been in love with her for ages.
let’s go back a little. since i was seven, when i first started looking at girls differently, i had this very private world i’ve already written about. basically, i had my music. my stuffed animals. and the girl i was in love with. all part of a little, secret and private world. that’s an easy explanation as to why these girls where almost never actually people i talked to or had any kind of relation with. they would just inspire my dreams. i do believe that i didn’t make up their personalities, i was much too much of the observing kind. but it was just better to know them from a distance. and so it was with sarah dumber (at age 7) and those who followed her footsteps: yvonne dobert, birte brettschneider, isabel willkommen, anja beusch and imke beusch. typically, they would have long periods of my full attention and of my little world’s reign; long if you take into account that i was young, and that i didn’t know them. michaela (at age 8) and jana (at age 12) were the exceptions. actually, the jana story (which will deserve it’s own post) divided my personal romantic history into pre (also known as the golden age) and post (the modern age).
when eva came along, it was as if i had found the ultimate girl to be in love with. for me, she was simply perfect. the perfect look, the perfect looks, the prefect way of being, the perfect smile. just perfect. not in an objective, complete kind of way, but in a very personal, private kind of way. a way that i’m sure no one else was seeing her. after quite some time, i even told my friends a little about her, and they didn’t see anything special; which actually pleased me. because, in that one sense, she was mine. in that view of her, she was unique to me.
in the summer, she and her friends would walk around the sports field, and i would normally be out there with a friend, chatting and watching her from a distance. in the winter time, she would hang out in the basement of our school, with her friends (often joined by jana and bärchen). i knew exactly where she was and would pass by at least twice to get a glance at her. but it wasn’t unusual that i just couldn’t look, although she didn’t even know i existed. i mean, to look right at her… it really made my heart start. i’d been as deeply in love with any of those girls before eva, at least as deep as you can be at that age. but this was a new level.
the winter came and i went to brazil for the first time at this time of year. this was the first time that i had spent a semester without having my older brother andre around, so i was glad to meet him there. he had gone to brazil to stay at a boarding school for a year (to get to know the language, culture and family), a fate that was waiting for me only a year later. well, in brazil, something very unusual happened. in a very short amount of time, i really got interested in a girl i got to know there. priscila was her name, and she totally blew me away. by the way, once again, leo was also interested. and a third guy called rafael was absolutely crazy about her. near new year’s, i had to admit that i had fallen in love with her. but when i got on the plane back to germany only a few days later, i knew that eva was back at number one. this was the first time that someone’s “time on the thrown” was interrupted by someone else. but eva was back, and that wouldn’t be the only time!
although priscila did earn a special place in my heart that next semester, it was no comparison to eva in all her glory. she went from using her winter clothes and the bus 1977 from her little town deutsch-evern (77, by the way, is the year i was born) to using a beautiful spring and summer dress and her bike. beauty – so much more than external beauty. i’m guessing that you know what i’m talking about. or do you? today, i went to a region near Interlaken, switzerland, to see the alps. i love the alps, they are the most beautiful natural region i know, i really love them. i didn’t say too much, but i was very excited to see them today and took quite a lot of pictures (http://flama4.multiply.com/photos/album/27/a_day_near_interlaken# if you want to check them out). a true beauty. and one of the most beautiful sights i’ve ever had. but the most beautiful i have to tell you about in my next post. very special and unforgettable moments, the birth of a true myth.
let’s go back a little. since i was seven, when i first started looking at girls differently, i had this very private world i’ve already written about. basically, i had my music. my stuffed animals. and the girl i was in love with. all part of a little, secret and private world. that’s an easy explanation as to why these girls where almost never actually people i talked to or had any kind of relation with. they would just inspire my dreams. i do believe that i didn’t make up their personalities, i was much too much of the observing kind. but it was just better to know them from a distance. and so it was with sarah dumber (at age 7) and those who followed her footsteps: yvonne dobert, birte brettschneider, isabel willkommen, anja beusch and imke beusch. typically, they would have long periods of my full attention and of my little world’s reign; long if you take into account that i was young, and that i didn’t know them. michaela (at age 8) and jana (at age 12) were the exceptions. actually, the jana story (which will deserve it’s own post) divided my personal romantic history into pre (also known as the golden age) and post (the modern age).
when eva came along, it was as if i had found the ultimate girl to be in love with. for me, she was simply perfect. the perfect look, the perfect looks, the prefect way of being, the perfect smile. just perfect. not in an objective, complete kind of way, but in a very personal, private kind of way. a way that i’m sure no one else was seeing her. after quite some time, i even told my friends a little about her, and they didn’t see anything special; which actually pleased me. because, in that one sense, she was mine. in that view of her, she was unique to me.
in the summer, she and her friends would walk around the sports field, and i would normally be out there with a friend, chatting and watching her from a distance. in the winter time, she would hang out in the basement of our school, with her friends (often joined by jana and bärchen). i knew exactly where she was and would pass by at least twice to get a glance at her. but it wasn’t unusual that i just couldn’t look, although she didn’t even know i existed. i mean, to look right at her… it really made my heart start. i’d been as deeply in love with any of those girls before eva, at least as deep as you can be at that age. but this was a new level.
the winter came and i went to brazil for the first time at this time of year. this was the first time that i had spent a semester without having my older brother andre around, so i was glad to meet him there. he had gone to brazil to stay at a boarding school for a year (to get to know the language, culture and family), a fate that was waiting for me only a year later. well, in brazil, something very unusual happened. in a very short amount of time, i really got interested in a girl i got to know there. priscila was her name, and she totally blew me away. by the way, once again, leo was also interested. and a third guy called rafael was absolutely crazy about her. near new year’s, i had to admit that i had fallen in love with her. but when i got on the plane back to germany only a few days later, i knew that eva was back at number one. this was the first time that someone’s “time on the thrown” was interrupted by someone else. but eva was back, and that wouldn’t be the only time!
although priscila did earn a special place in my heart that next semester, it was no comparison to eva in all her glory. she went from using her winter clothes and the bus 1977 from her little town deutsch-evern (77, by the way, is the year i was born) to using a beautiful spring and summer dress and her bike. beauty – so much more than external beauty. i’m guessing that you know what i’m talking about. or do you? today, i went to a region near Interlaken, switzerland, to see the alps. i love the alps, they are the most beautiful natural region i know, i really love them. i didn’t say too much, but i was very excited to see them today and took quite a lot of pictures (http://flama4.multiply.com/photos/album/27/a_day_near_interlaken# if you want to check them out). a true beauty. and one of the most beautiful sights i’ve ever had. but the most beautiful i have to tell you about in my next post. very special and unforgettable moments, the birth of a true myth.
2 comments:
such a sweet post.
i felt like I'd met the boy you were...
sweeeeeettttttt! like you.
because, in that one sense, she was mine.
bem bonito!
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